Can we smoke in here?

My little babies, the kindergarten kids, like to come flying at me with hugs, which is really adorable. However, they are at just the height that my stomach takes the weight of their head, and at 8:30 in the morning, after a weekend of food poisoning,  I realllly couldn’t handle that. So the Thai teacher explained that today, high fives were ok but that hugs were not – so when we were doing our warm up, prancing about and such, and I said “show me your stomachs!” (we had just learned the body parts and OH MY WORD you should see their little 5 year old wiggles and sashays when they have to show me their hips) several of them decided to show me MY stomach. Rather pointedly.
 
groooaaann.
 
This next happened in my last class, and all of these things happened in a single 50 minute period. Grade one students. I have no curriculuum right now – exams are done and we’re playing the waiting game until end of term. So they all gathered around on the floor for storytime (you should see them RUN when I pull out the book, and 30 six year olds chanting and acting along with you – beat THAT, bedtime story!).

28 of them were sitting. One boy was lying on his back, giggling. One boy was massaging and grabbing said boy’s penis, also giggling. THAT’S RECESS PLAY BOYS.

Another boy grabbed my skirt and tried to pull it up as I walked by. KID’S SIX.

Then, because we had read “Where the Wild Things Are” , I sent them back to their desks to draw their own monsters. WELL. One boy drew enormous breasts on his monster. Kid beside him yelled “Teacher! Teacher!” but, being an ESL student, he needed to mime, so he told on the kid by demonstrating breasts on himself. I walked over, and walked away trying very very hard not to laugh audibly and several boys, upon finding that Hun was not in trouble (because what can you do, really?! Right now he just associates breasts with his mom) and that teacher was amused, all stood up and started demonstrating their rather large breasts. Anything to make teacher laugh.
 
Oh dear.