Can we smoke in here?

I went to get my hair cut today. The hairdress took one look at my hair and said, “oh, no!”. She ran her fingers through my hair, clucking disapprovingly.

“Cut off?” she said. “Very damagee. Cut off?”

“Anniyo,” I said. “Just trim.” My hair is damaged because you bleached the hell out of it, I thought.

“But your hair is so weak and thin!”

THAT’S BECAUSE I’M WHITE, ASSHOLE.