Can we smoke in here?

Every so often, my body decides to remind me that it is designed for pregnancy. “Forget whatever else you want to do!” it says. “You’re a baby maker and don’t you forget it!”

Today I think I tore a milk duct.

Seriously. My boobies are so sore. Every time I take a step they feel like they might rip right off and fall at my feet. Gross.

I’ve been in a fog all week. Can you call in sick to work because you have sad?

“Sorry,” I’d say to my boss. “I have sad.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, it’s pretty bad. I’m going to have to stay in bed all day.”
“When will you be back?”
“Hard to say, really. Should clear up by Friday.”